Little voices

There are things we say on a daily basis. 

"Good morning" "hello""goodbye""I love you"...

But when our kids say those same little things in their own little ways in their sweet little voices... You melt. 

Every morning I hear two things, with out fail. 

1- Chloie "THE SKIES AWAKE!!!!" 

2- Evelynne "Hi mom!!! Mom!! Hi!!!" 

We also hear a lot of "NO"'s from Evelynne. 

And at least one "I wake up the baby!!" From Chloie. 

I have two girls who rarely ever stop talking. 

My favorite things to hear from them are:

"Your my most bestest friend, honey" & "You're home!!! I missed you so much!" (To pretty much anyone who comes through the door)

-chloie 

And "I you!" (I love you) & "gickle gickle gickle!" (Tickle tickle tickle) 

-Evelynne 

And we have one song being sung on repeat pretty much everyday.... Bet ya can't guess which song! 

(Let it go -frozen)

 

Now the reason I am talking about things I love hearing my kids say is because today was a rough day. 

Lots of crying, screaming, ornery kiddos... 

But I just put Eve down for bed and she said "night-night ma" for the first time and then chloie curled up in my lap and whispered "I love you, mommy" 

And all the stress of the day just slipped away.

Two very simple things were said and some how they fixed everything. 

Isn't amazing how things that seem so ordinary when you say them can somehow seem so extraordinary when your child says them?? 

❤️ 

Blessed.

So, as most of you know, I have a couple extra kiddos floating around my house pretty much every day.

Oliver and Gwenny have definitely changed my life (for the better). :)

It has been so fun this past year watching Oliver, he is such a goofy little guy. 

He and Eve are usually the best of friends, giving hugs and kisses, and holding hands. They make my heart happy. But while watching ninja turtles Chloie becomes his best bud. They do ninja moves all over and giggle. It's pretty fun to watch.  

I've been watching Gwenny since her mommy started going back to school in January (Go Jen!) and I will have her through the summer semester and for the foreseeable future (possibly until her mom is finished with her schooling). Gwen and Chloie are pretty much inseparable when she is here. Chloie becomes Gwennys "keeper", she helps me calm her down when she's upset, shares her toys, kisses any owies, helps me feed her, helps me get her on the bus for school... Etc. It's been fun to see them bond and to see how much Gwen trusts her (she does not feel the same way with Eve and Oliver, they are a little more unpredictable :) )

 Having two additional littles to care for has not been easy BUT I wouldn't trade them for anything! 

I love seeing all their different personalities: 

Chloie is definitely the ring leader, she is talkative, stubborn, creative, and caring. And, oh man, can she sing! Loudly... For hours.. Haha 

Gwen is a quiet people watcher, though that pointer finger of hers can be awful demanding. (she is non-verbal) but she can be very vocal when she is happy (or upset). And although she almost seems afraid of Eve and Oliver she is so very gentle when they are close to her. 

Oliver is definitely all boy (which is a whole new world for this "girl mom") he Loves Ninja Turtles, in fact "turtles" is pretty much all he says all day. His laugh is contagious. And his tender heart just melts me, He loves to be snuggled when the girls are being "mean" (not sharing or to busy singing to play). And the fact that he hates to be messy/dirty is a breath of fresh air!  :) 

Evelynne is my quiet sneaker. Into everything, climbs anything, and does it all with a smile that could kill! She really could get away with murder with a smile like that. She is also very sweet, kisses for everyone! And the best napper! 

 

I will admit, not everyday is all sunshine and roses,  tantrums and rough days are to be expected with two- three year olds and two- one year olds. But the good days by far out weigh the "bad". 

I am so blessed to be able to be home with my littles and to be able to help with my niece and nephew. 

While somedays I wish I was able to run in and out of the grocery store in five minutes without a cart full of kids saying "hi" to everyone or some one saying "looks like you've got your hands full!"

 On the days where I "get" to leave the house alone I feel... Empty. Like there should be a child on each hip and at least one walking beside me and BOY am I socially awkward when there isn't a three year old talking for me... ;)

I guess what I am trying to say is that I love the life I've been given. 

I am happy. :)

A year ago today

-Sitting in a hospital 

holding the hand of a woman I'd know my entire life. 

Listening to monitors.

Starring at numbers.

Wish and hoping. 

Hugging my mother. 

Sitting with my best friends brother and 

Talking with his wife.

Trying my best to keep it together 

to stand by my friends side,

Because 

Through thick and through thin 

we've always been 

3nights we sat, my mother and I 

Begging her to squeeze our hands 

or bat an eye

Then a phone call from dad set my heart on fire 

My grandpa was sick

His situation seemed dire 

Not wanting him to miss the blessing of my child 

I threw together a simple celebration 

Not two hours before 

I revived a message

"Karen passed away peacefully, surrounded by family" 

I chose not to feel it

No tears would be shed, 

Until after my husband laid his hands on Eve's head 

Quietly I sat 

Hearing the sweet words

A blessing of a life just beginning 

Sitting next to a man whose life would, all too soon, be ending 

Sleep deprived and overwhelmed 

I sat numbly and watched 

Suddenly I felt a sweet presence 

A peaceful happiness 

as I looked at my child 

And I'm sure she was there 

From heaven she came

To be part of this moment 

To ease some of my pain

So much happened in so little of time

Too much to process

Too much to feel 

Holding it back was my way to deal

A whole year later 

And I'm still not sure it was real... -

(Both of these pictures were taken a year ago today)

How lucky am I to have known such an amazing woman? To have her daughter as one of my closest friends? 

I do not think I would be who I am today if I hadn't known the Wilson family. 

Karen was beautiful, inside and out. 

Plus, she raised my best friend. 

Who I honestly could not live without. 

I cannot put into words all of the memories I cherish of Karen. 

I'll remember her always and love her forever. 

❤️

Sleep.

It's 11pm and I'm lying on my couch with chloie asleep on my legs and Evelynne asleep on my lap. 

Today was nothing short of crazy. 

Eve was up til midnight last night and only took a short nap today. Chloie, on the other hand, fell asleep early and woke up early. Then took 2 naps. (Never happens)

My kids are rarely on the same schedule. 

So I am usually running on little to no sleep. 

I am worn out from the tantrums. 

I am worn out from making 50different breakfasts, snacks, lunches, and dinners, desperately trying to getmy two incredibly picky eaters to eat something. ANYTHING! 

I am exhausted from picking up and putting down kids. 

I am beat from chasing around a child who stole my lipstick. 

I am stressed from trying to catch eve as she tries to jump off or the kitchen table for the tenth time. 

These two seemingly innocent sleepers are chaos causers. 

They keep me on my toes. 

They keep me in shape. 

They keep me young and age me at the same time. 

But when I finally get both of them to sleep, I find myself wishing they were awake.

To hear chloie say "I love you, honey" one more time today. 

To see Evelynne's smile again as she dozes off. 

I can't wait for bed time most days. 

But as soon as it comes I can't wait for the morning. 

For chloie to run into my room and jump on my bed yelling "the skies awake! The skies awake! Mom! See the sun ate the stars!" 

Or For Evelynne to be wrapped around my leg as I make breakfast. 

And as worn out as I am I cannot, for the life of me, fall asleep.

My kids are holding still. They are snuggled up in my lap snoring.

And I love it. 

I don't want to sleep now, I'm enjoying the quiet perfection I'm witnessing. 

Sleep is overrated. 

Seeing the good

Little miss chloie has become her very own, unique, person. 

She is bossy, stubborn, smart, very vocal, sweet, and a little temperamental. 

Watching her personality blossom is so much fun. A little overwhelming at times but fun. 

She has become a backseat driver(red says stop! Turn here, no! not there, turn around) 

She thinks she's the boss (okay mom, go make you bed! And then make mine) 

She is a fashionista (oooo I love you tutu dress!) 

My favorite thing to see is her sweet side. She loves to give compliments. (Your hair is beautiful. I love your shoes. You're gorgeous...) 

I want my girls to be the kind of girls that compliment and lift others up. 

The kind of person I myself want to be. 

It is so easy to point out flaws and put people down. But, in my opinion, it is even easier to point out the good in people.

While I am hyper critical of myself, I choose to find something that I love about everyone. 

From their hair, or sense of style, to their ability to teach, or sing... Or whatever makes that person special. 

And I am thrilled that my three year old is already picking up on this. And honestly she's even better at it then I am!

She loves to tell random people how beautiful they are. She picks something they are wearing or even the sound of their voice and compliments them. 

She told a little old lady that she "loved her voice" the other day. 

I wish you all could have seen the look on that lady's face. Priceless. 

 

And the way she treats her baby sis, melts me everytime. 

She tells her things like "your eyes sparkle" and then gives her a kiss! It's the cutest thing I've ever seen. 

I must be doing something right..   :)

Ben

So I just realized my birthday is in 5days...

This year has been an odd one so far... I think I would have completely forgotten my own birthday if it weren't for my HUSBAND (that's right, Ben. My 5years in a row forgot my birthday husband) reminding me by asking what I want for my birthday and even taking time OFF from work.  

So not only did I get a dozen roses from Ben but he is "excited" (prepared) for my birthday...

I know right... Mind BLOWN! 

Honestly not even sure how to handle all of this... Niceness. 

I was fully prepared to ignore my birthday and maybe buy myself something pretty, as usual... But no... He's gone and made me feel special.

It's not even my birthday yet and I'm already overwhelmed. ;)

Everytime he brings up what he's getting me or where he's taking me for dinner I probably look like I'm in shock... Cause I sort of am... 

I'm liking this new semi-romantic-less-forgetful version on Ben. Definitely going to take some getting use to but I like it.. 

Can't wait to see what happens for our anniversary. ;) 

Ha.

"Mommy wars"

Is anyone else over this whole "mommy wars" thing? 

I feel like everywhere I look some mom is putting down the way another mom "mommys".

Whether it be the "you didn't breast feed?! Breast is best" Or "cloth diapering is better for your child and the environment" 

I feel like every move We make as moms is being judged and commented on. 

Why is that?

Does it matter if I chose to bottle and breast feed? Have a home Birth Or have an epidural? To use disposable diapers Or cloth diapers? 

Whether I co-slept or not, whether I do time out or not, whether bedtime is set in stone or more flexible... Those are my decisions. 

Why is it "wrong" to make holidays special by doing the 12 days of Christmas with goodies and fun activities or elf on the shelf? Or making heart shaped cookies for valentines? Or making all their food green for st pattys? 

Does the choice to make my kids feel special or make the holidays more fun really impact your life? 

I do not do the things I do as a parent to gain the approval of others. I do not do things to make you feel like you need to "keep up" or to hear how much better you are. 

I do them for me. 

And my children. 

I enjoy making homemade fingerpaints when we are bored. 

Doing chalk paint when the weather is nice.

And doing a thankful tree for thanks giving to not only teach my kids to be thankful but to give them something to look forward to. 

I want my kids to have the kind of childhood I did. I want them to remember frosting cookies for Santa, catching leprachons in the backyard, and staying up all night trying to catch a glimpse of the Easter bunny.

Isn't that every parents goal? To make their child's childhood something fun for them (and us) to look back on?

Everyone parents differently. 

There is not right or wrong way. 

We are all just doing we best we can.

So let's stop putting eachother down and start cheering eachother on. 

:)