Chloie

Chloie has become quite the chatter box as of late. And has bee spouting the most random things. 

Some e of my favorite things she says have been: 

"I haven't seen this in TWENTY years!!!" - while cleaning her room. 

"I'm six years old, mom! I'm not a child" - whenever I ask her to do something. 

"I don't know how to make bodies! My mom made us" referring to building a Lego robot. 

"You're the most beautiful, and beautifullest, beautifuller mommy ever" when I tell her she's beautiful. :) 

She is the funniest little girl. 

I really enjoy being with her all day everyday and being able to watch her become a "person".  

Be the good

Being a mommy is hard work. 

Whether you are a working mom or a stay-at-home mom. (I've done both)

IT IS DIFFICULT. 

And to be a mom now days is especially hard. 

Because we make it hard on eachother. 

Maybe it's just my size and my youthful appearance, but I get A TON of unsolicited "advice". 

Anyone else experience this? 

I generally have at least three kids with me everywhere I go and (almost) without fail someone stops me to offer a word of advice. Or to tell me I'm tooyoung to have Sooo many kids. Or my personal favorite the "your child wouldn't behave that way if you didn't/weren't (insert something condescending here)"

It's a wonderfully opinionated world we live it, isn't it?

I even had a man refuse to open a door for me while I was holding my 40lb special needs neice, dragging my (kicking and screaming) two year old, and pleading with my three year old to keep up. After which he said "if you put the big one down and let her walk your life might be easier" to which I replied "if she could walk on her own I wouldn't being carrying her". 

So, why is it that when we see someone struggling we offer up judgment instead of a helping hand?

Do we honestly think we know more/better than everyone else?

What I am getting at here is  next time you see someone in need (whether they're struggling with an ornery child or just have their hands full) offer up a helping hand, or a KIND word. 

Be the good in someone's day. 

Put yourself in someone else's situation and treat them how you would want to be treated. 

Miss Evelynne

It's the middle of the night. Evelynne is snuggled up on my chest asleep. 

In just a few hours she will be two years old - though she's been acting two for months now ;) 

 

::Birthday letter:: 

Dear sweet Evelynne, 

In the morning you will be two!! 

I cannot believe just how quickly you have gone from being placed on my chest -just moments old- to being a talkative, outgoing, independent (almost) two year old.

I love watching you explore, create, and play. 

Hearing new words come out of your mouth has become a daily thing and each time I am more and more amazed at how quickly you pick things up. 

You already have such a funny personality and have developed a quit wit and silly sense of humor. 

You are very attached to your mommy. You spend most of the day making sure I am within reach and you make it very clear when I has strayed too far for your liking. :) 

You are the sweetest little love (most days) you hug and kiss everyone. You randomly come snuggle and kiss me during the day and tell me you love me at least 20 times a day. 

But just cause you are tiny and sweet doesn't mean you don't stand up for yourself and, BOY, do You have a temper when things don't go your way.. ;)

I'm a little sad that age one has come and gone so quickly but I am excited to see what changes come out way during this next year of your life. 

Happy birthday, my sweet baby. 

I love you to the moon! 

-mommy 

Reality.

Can I be real for a minute? Is that okay to do? 

Most of the "being a mommy" articles I've read lately talk about how wonderful being a parent is and how every moment is amazing. 

I don't know about anyone else but I feel like these articles are there to make me feel like I'm not doing enough. The pictures that go along with them are these perfect spotless homes, perfectly dresses kids, stylish moms with flawless hair and makeup... If only that were my reality. 

I get that motherhood is a blessing and kids are tiny miracles but sometimes those tiny miracles make me wanna rip out my hair. 

If you came to my house right now you would find toys everywhere, sipping cups soaking in the sink, crayon artwork on most of my walls and piles of laundry in each of our bedrooms. 

I am a neat freak. I LOVE LOVE LOVE when my house is spotless and smells like Lysol.

 BUT the reality of having 3 to 4 kids daily under 4 with 2 in 2 separate preschools is that my house is rarely clean. 

And the majority of the time I'm too exhausted to clean so I just sit in the midst of the mess trying my best not to cry, or scream. 

Being a mom raising two kids and watching other kids full time is overwhelming at times. 

YES,  it's a joyous, wonderful, meaningful  blessing I've been given just being a mom. 

And YES, I am lucky enough to be able to help with my neice and nephew as well as stay home to raise my own kids. 

But good gosh it is hard. 

I don't get days off, date nights are few and far between (finding a babysitter when you are seen as the babysitter is next to impossible), And I can't even remember the last time I slept through the night. 

Not everyday is wonderful. 

Somedays are down right dreadful. 

I guess what I am getting at is motherhood isn't picture perfect all the time, there are moments and those little moments of joy are what carry us through the rest of it. 

I just wish that magazines and Pinterest would just stop making it look like life as a mom is perfect. 

It is wonderful and amazing. 

But rarely is it perfect. 

Change

I knew that a change in my attitude would result in a change in my kids attitudes and my nieces too. 

I knew that positivity is contagious. 

But I never imagined the change it would make in my marriage. In my husband, to be specific. 

Now I'm not talking about a huge, mind blowing type change I'm talking about a change in the little things. 

Helping me with chores without me asking for help, giving me time alone after the kids go to bed (which is so needed when your life revolves around others), he even opened the car door for me the other day. Which on its own is a small miracle. (He has not done that since before our wedding. 5years ago) 

The way he talks to me has changed and the way he looks at me has changed. 

It is amazing how a change i made for myself has effected everyone around me. 

I have not felt better about myself, my life, and my marriage before. 

And it not like something drastic had to change. 

I chose to be happy.

 I chose to be positive. 

I chose to be a better person. 

It was that simple. :)

Positivity

"Positive thoughts generate positive feelings and attract positive life experiences."

My life can be a bit stressful. And a bit depressing. 

I'm alone a LOT with 2 to 4 kids under the age 4. 

And while I'm never actually alone I feel lonely quite often. 

Last year there were a few days where negative thinking got the best of me. 

And I've chosen to do things differently this year (school year). 

Positivity is contagious. 

I have found over the last few weeks that if I wake up with a positive attitude my kids "catch" it. Then when I act positively towards my niece Gwenny (instead of being half asleep and rather indifferent like I have done in the past) when I get her out of her car each morning she reacts positively. Which in turn makes my day a whole lot easier. 

Positive reassurance is also helpful around my house... For some reason everytime I try to go to the bathroom or get a drink I have a herd of children chasing me, screaming and crying because for some reason (even my kids)  think I'm leaving them. 

So we say lots of "I love you"'s "I'm right here" "I'm not leaving" and "you can come too"'s 

Seems to help with the group emotional breakdowns. 

--

Today when I dropped Gwenny off with my mother in law she (Gwen) did not want me to leave her. I was holding her and as soon as we walked in the house she squeezed my arm tight and started pointing to me (her way of saying she wants to stay with you) and waving "bye bye" to grandma. Which is very unusual (She LOVES her grandma!). But honestly, I loved it. 

I love that I have been able to develop such a great relationship with her and that she has grown kind of attached to me. 

It's amazing how a positive action like that from a child can make you feel so loved! 

 --

Lately at the end of our busy days (or in the morning while kids eat breakfast when ben is home) I do a quick yoga session to help relax and center myself. 

Seriously, it has helped a ton! 

My attitude has changed, the way I talk to my husband and children has changed, and the way I feel about myself is changing. 

Positive thoughts and actions create a positive atmosphere. 

Try a little harder - To be a little better

Today was interesting.

I found myself frustrated by my 3 year olds frustrations. 

Funny how that works, huh? 

The harder she tries to tell me what she needs or how she feels the harder it becomes to understand her. 

The simplest miscommunications between us can cause chaos. 

Tempertantrums. 

Tears. 

Feet stomping. 

The whole nine-yards. 

Things that seem meaningless to me, in my hurry to get from point A to point B. 

Are things that can easily ruin my child's day. 

From grabbing the "wrong" box of Popsicles. 

To giving her pjs that she just doesn't want to wear. 

Frustrations seem to be everywhere. 

What really got to me today was a melt down over something important. 

You see, baby gave me a kiss then I turned away to finish my chore. 

Suddenly Chloie was screaming. 

Bright red face and crocodile tears.

And because I could not even begin to guess what had upset her I started to get upset too. 

Which made it even harder for both of us.  

So. It took me a while to calm her. 

Finally, Between sobs, she said "you didn't give me a kiss too! I need loves too!" 

My heart sunk. 

I don't remember her asking for a kiss. 

And to see her so upset over it... 

Broke my heart. 

How frustrating it must be to be so little and have such big feelings. 

Just another reason for me to try a little harder, to be a little better.